MITIGATING RISK OF LOVE: FEELINGS FLOWING OVER AN OCEAN

Today’s Prayer to Passage continues within the ancient scriptures of the “Nag Hamadi”. This month’s spiritual devotion to these texts will be taking place between June 1 – June 30, 2017.

Today I pray, “Dear God, I am taking a few more days off from work to un-jet-lag myself and move forward from the energy of love that blindsided me in Europe. Mitigating the risk of love feelings flowing all the way over an ocean where I cannot be with him. That is tough. This is difficult. And I can do this. Thank You for your guidance.”

Following my prayer, I held the closed book in my hands and opened it to reveal this passage:

“”But many others, who oppose the truth and are the messengers of error, will set up their error and their law against these pure thoughts of mine, as looking out from one (perspective) thinking that good and evil are from one (source). They do business in my word. And they will propagate harsh fate. The race of immortal souls will go in it in vain, until my Parousia. For they shall come out of them – and my forgiveness of their transgressions, into which they fell through their adversaries, whose ransom I got from the slavery in which they were, to give them freedom that they may create an imitation remnant in the name of a dead man, who is Hermas, of the first-born of unrighteousness, in order that the light which exists may not believed by the little ones. But those of this sort are the workers who will be cast into the outer darkness, away from the sons of light. For neither will they enter, nor do they permit those who are going up to their approval for their release.””
—NAG HAMADI SCRIPTURES

I work 40 hours a week in the conversation of the PATRIOT ACT. Mitigating risk. This is what I do for a living. I work for a long-established national Corporation. The largest in its market. I mitigate risk for a living. This is what I do. Heh. For money. I protect money to make money. Glad we could have this warm and cozy get-to-know-me chat.

And now, I have some time off from work. A vacation! A vacation! A vacation! (My first trip to Europe in my four years with this company merits a triple shout.) I really should have traveled to Europe three times in the past four years. One needs to “escape” America to “help” America.

It’s a squeaky clean agreement. It smells like soap. It smells good. But there is a dirty secret here… I come too close to a hot, sweaty front of rotting garbage. Hot garbage. Not enough soap can make that sensibly pristine. The hot garbage here is that I am being unfair to myself. My job does not match me. It does not fit me. It mitigate the risk of not being able to pay my student loans. I mitigate the risk of not having health insurance.

I need some time away. Right? You get it by now. I sleep. Back from Europe and needing to deal with the ridiculous that is the typical U.S. scenario these days, I sleeeeeeeeep. I seek wisdom from within. I try and forget about this funny little thing called love. European love affairs? Risk.

Take it from me. European love affairs? Risk. European love affairs? Risk. European? A love affair divination to the first lucky American jerk to show up. Lucky me. I’ll get this figured out. Just give me a few more European vacations to get there. Ugh.

What is actually happening, deep down? I wish I could tell you. I’ll keep you posted. Love.

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