DONE ALL THE WORK

Today’s Prayer to Passage will be from the book ‘The Magicians’ by Lev Grossman.

Today I pray, “Dear God, It is a comfort and a blessing to be able to spend time with family in Minnesota. Living in New York City and Chicago taught me extraordinary life lessons about myself, the world, and living forward. Thank you for a return to Minnesota, home, and family. Amen.”

Following my prayer, I held the closed book in my hands and opened it to this passage:

“He wasn’t surprised. He was used to this anticlimactic feeling, where by the time you’ve done all the work to get something you don’t even want it anymore.”
—LEV GROSSMAN

I moved to New York City to meet my husband and to experience living in New York City. And both of these dreams came true. I moved to Chicago to honor my husband and to continue building a life with him. And I returned to Minnesota after my husband’s extramarital affairs and abuse brought upon his words, “Too much damage has been done.” Looking at it in this manner, yes, it appears anticlimactic. Yet my epic truth began the night I met my husband.

We met online and spoke on the phone every night for about two weeks before our first date. Two of my girlfriends, being street-smart New Yorkers, were insistent on going with me that evening, wanting to see that I was safe to be left alone with the guy at the coffee shop where we chose to meet. On our way to the coffee shop, my two girlfriends pointed out a sidewalk chalkboard advertising psychic readings in the building next door. On a whim, the three of us walked in to receive personal readings. I was hesitant, yet there was an air of destiny that evening.

The woman told me: “You will meet a man very soon. He works in an area of construction. You will fall in love with him very quickly, and think he is the one. You may even get married following a brief courtship. But he will not be the one for you. Years later, you will meet another man. He will be working for a pharmaceutical company. He will be the one for you.”

I really didn’t think much of the forecast, except to place it in my memory-bank for a time in the future. Minutes later, I was sitting at a table on my first date with my future husband. I remember asking him, “You’ve probably told me over the phone but I cannot recall. What do you do for a living?” He responded by telling me that he worked for a construction company. I laughed out loud. The rest of the story was, well, anticlimactic. We were married less than three months later.

After our marriage ended, I found myself asking men, on our first dates, if they worked for a pharmaceutical company. I mean, c’mon! Gotta keep it real, right? To no avail, every man said no. Last year, after a devastating break-up, I tried online dating for the first time since having met my now former husband. It had been twelve years since my last — and only other — experience of meeting a man online.

After conversing via instant messaging with around 100 men in less than 48 hours (I really wanted to get over that previous heartbreaker), I met one man that I liked. And he stood out in a way that felt more natural than any friendship I had ever had. It was easy, drama-free, and delightful. I gave him my phone number upon his request and disconnected from the online dating world before I realized that I had forgotten to ask him for his number in return. Two days later, in modern-day fashion, he texted me. I was elated.

A few weeks into our dating, I realized — without asking — that he worked as a photographer and graphic designer. And this might be a bit of a climax: He worked as a photographer and graphic designer for a pharmaceutical company. It had been so many years since the psychic reading, and I felt so old and tired upon the moment of the puzzle pieces fitting into place, that I received the news as a feeling of “Finally. At last.” I had done all the work, on myself, to finally be in a place where I was ready to meet him. And there he was … and is (we are a very happy couple). And as for our relationship, I DO even want it anymore. Happy ending.

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